Monday, December 27, 2010

Stuff My 3 year old said this Christmas.

1. Three year old says, "I love my beautiful alcoholic dress!"

I tell the 15 year old that the 3 year old just said this.

"Oh, yeah. I got THE OFFICE'S Christmas video and he learned that from the Meredith intervention episode."

2. I'm talking about a dream I had where my old friend Anita showed up.

Three year old, while eating breakfast, says, "Anita Hill?"

Okay, the last time I said the words Anita Hill in this house was months ago when Clarence Thomas's wife wanted Hill to apologize after all these years - as if Hill did anything wrong. Sure, I was fired up, but that's just weird.

3. We're saying our prayers, which are long as a way to forestall falling asleep. The litany goes, "Watch over this person and that person ..."

The three year old says, "And watch over your hair, Mommy, and your roots."

Okay, fine. I could use some touching up, but do I need prayers? Maybe, okay. Fine.

Once the kid's asleep, I tell the 15 year old what just happened. "How does he know about touching up my roots?"

She thinks about it. "TABITHA'S SALON TAKE OVER?" she says. "Wow, I guess he pays more attention than I thought."

This is all basically a replay of my childhood. Like my three year old, I was the youngest of four after a size-able gap. I heard everything. I parroted.

And I survived -- with an extensive vocabulary. Worse things.